Retirement is not a life without purpose; it is the ongoing purpose that provides meaningfulness. May you enjoy every minute of your retirement. 4. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Unknown, "Retirement: World's longest coffee break." Some people can't wait for that Social Security or pension check to land in their mailboxes as they can head straight to the lake or mountains. Thank you for all you've done and the legacy you've left for the next generation. Will Rogers, "Often when you think you're at the end of something, you're at the beginning of something else." Police say they have nothing to go on. The money is no better in retirement but the hours are! Dishes the police. 7. Before he knows it, the bridge is right in front of him and his truck gets wedged under it. Act like the inner young person you have always been. J.A. It is the beginning of the open highway. Unknown, Dont act your age in retirement. retirement savings in an IRA or qualified plan such as a 401(k). Retirement is not the end of the road. Congratulations on your well-earned retirement. Dislike Like. I get to enjoy all the things I never stopped to notice on the way up. in all your future endeavors! Before you write, think. The public are the police and the police are the public, and both share the same responsibility for community safety. different scenarios on retirement income. Retirement caps a career and opens the door to long-anticipated plans and dreams. These words may help. After observing some erratic driving, he pulls the man over. I saw a fruit running from the police recently. Assisted Living Checklist: What To Ask & What To Look For, Quotes & Sayings For Retirement Cards 110 Quotes Continued, Retirement Party Ideas For Coworker | Canyon Winds, 30 Quotations About Getting Old - Desert Winds Retirement Community, Physical Games For Seniors - MeasurAbilities, LLC, 68 Retirement Wishes For A Boss - Canyon Winds Retirement, 65 Quotes About Getting Older | Funny & Inspirational Sayings, 55 Funny And Inspirational Quotes About Aging - Vista Winds Retirement, Motivational Fitness Quotes - Body Smith Fitness, 75 Funny Music Quotes - Amazing Mobile Music, 65 Getting Older Quotes | Chaparral Winds Retirement, Age is an issue of mind over matter. Funny retirement sayings and quotes. Funny quotes Retirement quotes The rolling contract was designed to specifically take away some of that retirement talk and retirement issue. A life which is empty of purpose until 65 will not suddenly become filled on retirement. An officer stops a man for speeding and notices he's not wearing his required prescription glasses. Funny retirement teacher retirement party police sarcastic police humor funny jokes facebook status it is what it is funny facebook status jobs sarcasm smart alec. Danielle Duckery, "You have to put off being young until you can retire." Present This to You as a Symbol of Why did the NYPD show up at the Mets game? The guy touches his elbow and winces in . They suspected it of fowl play, Do you know why diarrhea is hereditary? It was mugged. 10. Julius Sharpe"There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working." Many folks think they arent good at earning money, when what they dont know is how to use it. Why was it hard for police to catch the tree bandit? Some call it retirement. 30. Please dont go now. What would you do if I stole a kiss? Your tireless work ethic and Mario Puzo, You can be young without money but you cant be old without it. picclick.com. 30. Funny retirement cake sayings are always a big hit (though not always appropriate for a workplace event). Sargent: "Thank you ma'am, one of my officers told me you didn't have a license, that you stole this car, and that you murdered and hacked up the owner." Woman: "I bet the bastard will say I was speeding too." sergeant police joke confession woman driver speeding. 124 Retirement Quotes: Funny Retirement Quotes, Inspirational Retirement Quotes and More! Congratulations. Before you quit, try. Police are usually shocked that I have a record. So I do it three or four times a day." - Gene Perret "When a man retires, his wife gets twice the husband but only half the income" - Chi Chi Rodriguez It's time to work on your golf game, enjoy retirement! Officer: Do you know how fast you were going?, Driver: Sorry, I was just trying to catch up with traffic. Officer: There is no traffic. We, your Friends and Brothers, George Burns, People ask me what Id most appreciate getting for my eighty-seventh birthday. Why did the police officer smell so bad? 2023 NewRetirement, Inc. All rights reserved. However, the following funny retirement quotes for coworkers will help to make the retiring person smile by . Some call it retirement; I call it bliss. Betty Sullivan, In retirement, I look for days off from my days off. Mason Cooley, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Andy Rooney, Work is the curse of the drinking classes. Oscar Wilde, The company gave me an aptitude test and I found out the work I was best suited for was retirement. Unknown, Sometimes its hard to tell if retirement is a reward for a lifetime of hard work or a punishment. Terri Guillemets, I think that retirement is the first step towards the grave. Hugh Hefner, Often when you are at the end of something, youre at the beginning of something else. Fred Rogers, Retirement is not in my vocabulary. Soren Kierkegaard, To be able to fill leisure intelligently is the last product of civilization , and at present very few people have reached this level. They said he was a real pro for a first offender. 4. 6. He or she who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement. This song shows that even goodbyes can be hellos to a new part of life. Women go right on cooking." Dave Ramsey. Sandra Day OConnor, Retirement is not in my vocabulary. Before cuffing the artist, he looked at the mural and said, Now that is bold.. So, he died of natural causes. 10. Showing search results for "Police Retirement" sorted by relevance. What do police officers do when they are on the volleyball court? A police officer just knocked on my door and told me my dogs are chasing people on bikes. Law enforcement officer retirement quotes are always inspiring, our samples are uplifting and warm but you can customize your gift plaque with any quote you choose. Jim Bishop, Dont play too much golf. A Russian man goes to the secret police and says, My talking parrot disappeared., I called the cops about a murder on my front lawn. May we live up to your example. Oliver Wendell Holmes, The best is yet to come! Bill Waterson, "Say goodbye to tension and hello to your pension." General Letter Board or Cake Sayings for . Retiring State Trooper Think of all the lives you've helped in your career. Jonathan Clements, Money is something you got to make in case you dont die. I cant get old; Im working. A Life Long Friendship. Financial peace isnt the acquisition of stuff. You Served Honestly, Faithfully and # funny # animation # illustration # woman # drawing # happy # fun # party # stars # day # happy # fun # celebration # work . The juicy bit of gossip everybody's been mouthing is that I'm going to retire. 13 Funny Retirement Quotes to Write in Retirement Cards Lindsay Tigar Updated: Jan. 13, 2023 Retirement is a happy, celebratory time where one can finally reap the benefits of multi-decade. If you look at what you dont have in life, youll never have enough. Some call it 'retirement.' If you look at what you have in life, youll always have more. William Shakespeare, Age to me means nothing. 26. By subscribing to this BDG newsletter, you agree to our. Unknown, "Retirement: When you stop lying about your age and start lying around the house." The best part about is that they will be relatable to just about. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it." - Gene Perret "I enjoy waking up and not having to go to work. Add some lighthearted sarcasm and entertaining tidbits by drawing on famous retirement quotes and sayings from comedic characters, Marvel heroes, favorite reality stars, and more: Bowery King: "You're not very good at retiring. Gene Perret, "My father calls acting 'a state of permanent retirement with short spurts of work.'" 13. Retirement is like coming home one day and telling your wife honey i m home for good. You ll laugh or cry when you read these famous quotations about retirement. I got a call from the police station saying they want to interview me. Vince Lombardi, Retirement is the ugliest word in the language. 11. Source Unknown, Do it yourself retirement planning: easy, comprehensive, reliable. The largest collection of retirement one line jokes in the world. - Greg Tamblyn " You gain two new best friends upon your retirement. As long as youre working, you stay young. done for this department over the years! It's all lazy days from now on! Why did the officer give the ghost a ticket? Kitty ONeill Collins, I never had the sense that there was an end: that there was a retirement or that there was a jackpot. Dwight D. Eisenhower, Planning is bringing the future into the present so that you can do something about it now. What do you call it when a prisoner takes his own mugshot? It is better to live rich than to die rich. Police retirement thank you quotes and sayings can be hard to settle on, so weve curated some wonderful options that would all look stunning as an engraving on 100 percent optical crystal. An officer observes a woman standing in the middle of the street. R.C. 34. James M. Barrie, A man ought to work. the People of the City of New York. As you plan retirement, figure out what to say in a retirement card or write a retirement speech, you will enjoy reading funny retirement quotes, inspirational retirement quotes and much more about this wonderful phase of life. Financial planning tools and services to put you on the path to the future you want, Blog 37. My girlfriend dressed up as a policewoman and told me I was under arrest on suspicion of being good in bed. If you give one of these to a colleague, friend, or family member that is looking forward to retirement, it will surely help you communicate your appreciation. When caught speeding, an airman on leave tried to talk an officer out of giving him a ticket. Why is a traffic cop the strongest man in the world? 11. What you get by achieving your goals is not as important as what you become by achieving your goals. The Beatles are well-known enough to be a great choice for a retirement party. For retirement planning, you should consider other vision, and trust you instill in us! All the best!". You must gain control over your money or the lack of it will forever control you. We wonder if he knows what he is leaving behind, because we already know. Harry Vardon, Theres never enough time to do all the nothing you want. 52. Clarence Darrow, "I'm not just retiring from the company; I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron." It is the only pleasure I have left. Let him come out as I do, and bark. 49. There are some who start their retirement long before they stop working. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. Funny Retirement Quotes. find on a particular financial institution, service provider or specific product's site. Our top 50 retirement quotes, wishes and sayings are useful for retirement cards. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver. Officer: No, I am an undercover detective. Tourist: So, why are you in uniform? Officer: Today is my day off.. Discover and share Police Funny Quotes About Retirement. Quotes tagged as "retirement" Showing 1-30 of 160. Ernest Hemingway, Theres no retirement for an artist, its your way of living so theres no end to it. Women go right on cooking.". Anonymous It is what we do." -Police Officer Andrew Laurinec. These Funny Comebacks And Insults Are What Our Minds Are Really Made Of. I'm Retired. 53. Retirement is a time to reflect and enjoy your golden years. Funny Quotes About Retirement "Age is an issue of mind over matter. The information presented is based on objective analysis, but it may not be the same that you #7 Dear husband, you have been successful all your life. Thats ridiculous. . Open up! present this to you in recognition of The best part about retirement is that you don t have to worry about getting caught for doing nothing. There is no requirement that police stop a person who enters a police station and states that he wishes to confess a crime or a person who calls the police to offer a confession because volunteered statements of any kind are not barred by the 5th Amendment. Nothing happens by accident. A police officer pulled me over and said, Papers.. Law Enforcement Officer Wife Support Law Enforcement Police Family Police Life Police Force Heroic Men Nypd Blue Gun Humor Definitely! Jeanne Moreau, Its paradoxical that the idea of living a long life appeals to everyone, but the idea of getting old doesnt appeal to anyone. Department, thank you for all you have 49 Police retirement Poems ranked in order of popularity and relevancy. West, You can never have the comeback if you dont have the retirement. Chael Sonnen, I see retirement as just another of these reinventions, another chance to do new things and be a new version of myself. Walt Mossberg, Golf is played by 20 million mature American men whose wives think they are out having fun. Jim Bishop, A lot of friends complain about their retirement. I'm pretty jealous of you, but needless to say, I'm happy for your retirement. We've found several retirement quotes and sayings that will fit their personality. A word of warning. Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does. A police officer arrested a bottle of water because it was wanted in three different states. I got stopped last night by a police officer. Browse all famous retirement quotes below, or select a specific topic from this list: The trouble with retirement is that you never get a day off. Doris Day, How old would you be if you didnt know how old you was? Unknown Army food: the spoils of war Unknown Friendly fire - isn't. Unknown Here's to making your retirement a dream come true! Are you married to a police officer? As she dug through her purse, she became more and more agitated. Confucius, "Well, I didn't grow up with that word 'retirement' as part of my consciousness. Instead of manually entering the email addresses you want to send to each and every time, you can now create your own personalized contact list that will be available for you to use any time you want to share one of our posts with your friends and family.